I’m a basic. I will embrace this. As such there are things I just literally can’t.
1. Pumpkin spice.
I said I was a basic, but pumpkin spice is just one thing I can’t even. I don’t get it. I don’t want pumpkin everything. It’s gone too far. I’m going to hulk smash the next pumpkin spice thing I see. Because I can’t.
This goes hand in hand with pumpkin spice. I can’t do leggings. Nope. Can’t. Even. Not pants. Too much jiggle for that. I don’t like camel toe. I don’t want to have a camel toe. I can’t.
3. Waking up before 8 am.
Why does anyone wake up early? When my kids wake up before 8 I want to die. I slightly die inside to be honest. I have Karina trained to go talk to the baby so the baby remains happy because if it’s before 8 am? I just can’t.
4. Whiny Facebook Posts.
You know what I’m talking about. The whiny ones fishing for attention like “OMG MY DAY IS TERRIBLE” and then when you ask why she tells you she’ll tell you later or that she doesn’t want to talk about it. Um obviously you do. You posted. I can’t.
5. Black Friday shopping.
Unless best buy is going to give me Alexander Skargard in a speedo, I just can’t even. Crowds are too much.
I think I need to read this book: